Month: January 2021

Give Yourself Permission to Cry

I have spent a lot of energy encouraging people to be positive. In fact, I created a Facebook group that I named “An Encouraging Word” to help people do just that. But as I posted today about thinking happy thoughts, I realized, it’s not always possible. We are in the midst of a pandemic. People around us are suffering. Our lives have indelibly changed, and so has the society we live in. People we love have contracted COVID-19 and have faced tremendous health challenges. Some have lost the battle. Children are being raised in bubbles, bereft of the benefits of both socialization and extracurricular activities that stimulate the mind and body. Essential workers risk themselves daily. The divisiveness in our country has plagued our news and social media for months. The list goes on and on. We may not even realize it, but in the depths of our psyche we are feeling an unbearable sadness for some or all of these things.

Crying is a powerful way to relieve stress. Allowing our tears to flow can be a cleansing act that leaves us reinvigorated to face the world. The trigger that turns on the faucet may seem completely random or even unidentifiable, but it is a response to the pain or stress we are feeling, even if it’s on a subconscious level and we can’t readily identify it. Watching a television show, reading a Facebook post, talking to a friend on the phone, have all been triggers for deep-seated emotions I wasn’t aware of, to surface unexpectedly. An emotional response has also happened when I was in the midst of a holiday celebration at work, suddenly filling my eyes with tears. The dam can threaten to burst at the most awkward times, but don’t let that stop you from recognizing your need to cry even if you feel compelled to delay your response until you get to a more private place.

I think my biggest takeaway when I reflect on all this is, that it is okay to have those moments when you sit down and just bawl. A real tear gushing, chest heaving, gasping for air, soak your shirt, cry session. God gave us tears for a purpose. It is a cleansing, like when rain refreshes the earth. But like rain, we don’t want it to turn into a destructive force and flood us, so we are unable to function. Release those pent-up emotions, then focus on healthy ways to cope with what brought them on. Find balance in your life – think happy thoughts and find ways to encourage yourself and others, but don’t deny yourself the opportunities to release the stress you are feeling, even if you don’t quite know why. A good cry can be a very good thing.